As I see the status updates post one by one…from my friends…my sisters…my daughters…my nieces…I’m so sorry someone did this to you…I’m sorry you had to experience that moment.
I’ll be honest: Posting “me too” was challenging for me. It made me feel vulnerable as if I were exposing some part of me that made me “less than”. As I typed the words I felt the emotional response that lives in those moments when I did not have a choice and I was victimized.
I don’t often express such raw truths on this public forum; however, I felt this one needed to be shared. Thank you for writing your truths.
This call to be transparent comes at a crucial time in our collective transformation. There is strength to be found in our shared experience and there is healing in knowing I am like you.
Each time a new status update is posted with “Me Too” I am flooded with the memory of those moments. This causes me to pause and do an ecology check and ask, “How does that make me feel?” Thankfully, I have done the work to repair the damage done at the hands of a man in a moment that has since become a memory. I have let go of the burden of the experience so that it has been neutralized.
So, what does the work include? Here are a few truths that may give you a helpful place to start:
First, recognize that You were victimized. You are not a victim. Having lived through the experience you are empowered to recognized it for what it was.
Second, understand that the shame that comes up when you recall the incident(s) is not yours. Take a deep breath and let it go.
Third, the only thing you are guilty of being is a girl. Your skirt was not too short, your blouse too low, or your legs too far apart. In the wise words of Don Miguel Ruiz, in The Four Agreements “Nothing anyone else does is because of you,” but rather comes from their own dream or nightmare.
“Me too” is about moments in our pasts when we felt vulnerable and powerless. At this point in your journey you have a choice to walk in your power as you embrace the truth of who you are today: A remarkably strong woman who has the combined force of a community that will create a world that is safe for all.